About alt.life

What do we talk about?

“It takes a village.”

Yes, we know, it’s such a cliché. But it’s still true, isn’t it? You may not be living next door to your mom, sister in law, and best friend from high school, but you still need community. Somebody to ask for advice when your pregnancy test comes up positive, and you just had the mother of all booze-fests last weekend. Or how best to negotiate for that promotion. Maybe your house is going on the market tomorrow, and your divorce was just finalized yesterday. You’re pondering whether going back to grad school is worth the $60k worth of loans. Or, you know, you just want to find a nice pair of jeans that makes your butt look good.

How can you find your tribe?

We’ve got your back.

Whether you’re looking for somebody to kvetch with about politics and fashion, or a community to support you as you struggle through a major life change, we’re here. (And since we’re international, somebody’s always here, even at 2 AM. It’s like a Hitchcock film. But with fewer birds.)

We’re a 21st-century coffee klatsch, stitch-and-bitch, moms’ group, book club, and lean-in circle. (And plenty of us don’t like coffee, knitting, kids, fiction, or Sheryl Sandberg. Some of us prefer kombucha, photography, dogs, cooking shows, and Ina May Gaskin. That’s what’s great about ADL—we make the communities we seek.)

Or as we of the hive mind sometimes prefer to say:

Drink the organic, locally sourced, NPR-approved, Splenda-sweetened Kool-Aid. (TM)

If pressed, we might admit to being a little crunchy (some of us), left-leaning (er, most of us), and skilled enough in typing with two fingers that we (mostly) manage to come up with readable posts, even from our phones. Thank goodness for spellcheck.

They love us. They really love us!

what some of our members have told us:

Everyone is intelligent, feminist, supportive, welcoming, interesting. It’s a massively supportive resource for the very difficult parts of life. It’s a mine of information. It’s the best thing on the web by far, IMHO.

I love ADL. I’ve never encountered such a thoughtful, supportive, intelligent group of women so willing to honestly share their lives with one another. It is — bar none — the most useful resource I have in my childcare library. I told the friend who referred me to this site that this was the best baby gift I received, and I meant that wholeheartedly. When I lost a pregnancy earlier this year, I don’t know what I would have done without the help of the ADL hive mind. My doctor was not forthcoming with the detailed information I craved, and ADL provided so many resources and experiences that helped guide me through a very difficult time. I can’t thank you all enough for making this site a reality.

it has been such a relief to find smart women having reasonable conversations around these topics. You know, where having sex to get pregnant is “goal oriented fucking” rather than “baby dancing”

ADL has everything. Seriously. When I decided to buy a new mattress, I came straight to ADL and found recommendations and anti-recommendations. When I was taking the bar, there was a thread of people doing the same thing, etc. So there’s always the information I need. But, once I’ve got that information, I’m not surrounded by JUST the mattress stuff or JUST the bar stuff. I can go see what Portland ladies are up to, who’s read a good book, what’s interesting in the news, and make internet friends.

I love the cool smart women. I love the supportive environment. I love the humor. Did I say I love the smart women? I am so impressed by the women who belong to this community. I wish I knew them in real life.

There is no way I could have gotten through the last year without ADL…really. Not a exaggeration at all. The support, advice and slaps across the face are all so appreciated.

Going from many years of having people around me all the time (from boarding school to a sorority to roommates in my grad school apartment) to living in a city where everybody lives far apart and is busy all the time, I really miss that sense of a 24/7 community. I love that I can look at my computer at any hour of the day and find other smart and funny women to chat with about just about anything. I also really like that ADL isn’t just a parenting board or just a newlywed board. There are people in all stages of career, marriage and parenting on the board so it’s easy to find people who are like me now and people who are where I want to be five years from now.

Join us!

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